I’m [still] Learning

I’m [still] Learning

I’m still learning and growing and struggling and living.

Because that’s life.

A little over six months ago I graduated with my master’s and a little later got married. Got a job, a house, even got a puppy! This is it, right? This is what I’ve been looking forward to for YEARS. Forever with the one I love, finally working as a clinical counselor, lounging with my pup. This is “adulting,” right?

So why am I so tired?

I’m still learning how hard my job really is. After years of school and internships, I’m still learning how hard it is to sit with someone and hold their grief. To sit with a high schooler as they struggle with the meaning of life. Sometimes we talk, and other times we play games or color. Because life is hard and sometimes they just need a break and to know that I’m listening to the words they aren’t saying. I’m feeling the anguish they are in without needing words.

I’m still learning.

I’m still learning that marriage isn’t always easy. Life is busy and it’s hard to make time when you both have crazy schedules. It’s easy to be selfish and get mad. Loving is HARD. 

I’m still learning, and that’s okay.

And I have to remind myself that it’s okay. When I feel like I’m the only one who doesn’t have it all together and I’m the only one struggling (I’m not). I have to remind myself to slow down. To take care of myself. Sometimes the hardest thing is putting one foot in front of the other. And that’s okay. Sometimes living is the most courageous thing you can do.